A goodbye to my Mom

“Your mom has cancer!” These are devastating words to hear. And these were the words I heard over the phone just about a month ago. The doctors didn’t give her very long either. Two weeks was what I heard. They found cancer in her lungs, Breast, Bone and Brain. They started treatment and she was upbeat and she told me that she was “looking forward to watching Gabriel (My one year old son) dance at his wedding.” She was determined to fight this thing. But as the treatments went on they proved to be too taxing, too grueling for her to continue and she made the choice to stop treatment. I am devastated once again. I feel as if my heart is shattering into little tiny pieces which no one can put back together again. It hurts more than I can express. But, I want to tell you about my mom. She wasn’t perfect. No she wasn’t but she was human. And she taught me what it is like to be human. She wasn’t rich. We never had a lot of money but she did help me to see all the things we did have. She wasn’t famous. To be honest there are a lot of people who are going to be totally unmoved at her passing. BUT she was famous to me. She was MOM and if there is any name in the world that is more famous than that one I dare you to tell me what it is. She made her mistakes, and I loved her! Sometimes because of those very mistakes! As I said before, She was Human. She loved, she hurt. Much the same as all of us. And through that process she taught me how to go on even when those things happen to us. It was my mom who loved me unconditionally. She taught me to love the things she loved, Animals, Reading, Theatre, Music… I love these things. She taught me how to. There is a special bond between a mother and her child. I will miss that bond! I will miss the chance to call her and ask for her help in making sense of life, I will miss the times when I could call to tell her about the newest thing my kids are doing , I will miss the times I would call her to cry over a hurt or heartbreak. When I was growing up sometimes it seemed as if all we ever had was each other. But we were able to persevere because we knew that whatever else happened, whatever else we faced we DID have each other. We knew there was always someone else standing in our corner and backing us up. I will miss that. She did her best to raise me, and she thought, as do I, that she did a pretty good job of that. I am lucky that I found a wife as wonderful as she is. I will probably be able to go on because if that. Sure she made mistakes, we all do. But she also did A lot right! I still love her and she will always have a special place in my heart and in the hearts of her grandchildren. What I think I am most thankful for right now is that she accepted Jesus Christ as her Lord and Savior, which means I can see her again someday. And when that day comes I want to run into her arms and tell her how much I love her and give her a great big “Bear Hug”. Like I always used to do. I love you MOM. And I will miss you. Love Steve.